The Road Not Taken. A poem by Robert Frost. 1920


TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Ku Petik Bintang-bintang, by Kenny Remy Martin

Kupetik bintang-bintang
Biarpun banyak halangan
Rela tempuhi segalanya
Onak yang kupijak bagaikan tak terasa

Kusedar sejak mula
Tiada jalan yang mudah
Tapi kuyakin di dalam hati
Akhir terkota jua sumpah dan janji

Walau sukarnya bagi mu sayang
Perjalanan menyakitkan
Tapi hadapilah dengan kesabaran
Kan tiba kebahagiaan

Tiada batasannya
Usia ataupun rupa
Kita bersama memulakannya
Sehingga ke akhir kita terus berdua

A few lines in Dost dost naa rahaa, a song from Sangam, that have been playing in my head for the past few days ...

dost dost naa rahaa
pyaar pyaar naa rahaa
zindagii hamen teraa
aitabaar naa rahaa …

Something about good friends are difficult to find and when they double cross then it becomes very tragic.

last night while the boys were having dinner at the warung at level 4 of suria klcc, one of them pointed out an english error on the disposable cups ... "Many choice. One great place."

last week, on one of the days when it rained in the morning, i had breakfast there too. a rat ran around on the floor to the screams of eaters. a few minutes later, tan sri azizan zainul abidin turned up to have his breakfast. i wish he had been there earlier to see the rat.

Heard over the radio Broken Wings by Mr. Mister ... how apt ...

Baby I don't understand
Why we can't just hold on
To each other's hands
This time will be the last
I fear unless I make it all so clear
I need you so

Take these broken wings
And learn to fly again
And learn to live so free
And when we hear the voices sing
The book of love will open up
And let us in

Baby I think tonight
We can take what was wrong
And make it right
I need you so
Baby it's all I know
That you're half of the flesh
And blood makes me whole
I need you so

Correction: Sherry's still with the bank, and running her own business at the same time.

Mom and dad going to Mekah on 5 Jan. I hope they make it home again. But I wonder what they hope.

I was getting a ride down the escalator. That lady standing one step below me looked familiar. I could only see her profile partly so I couldn't tell for sure. She was in a vermilion tee, a pair of jeans, her long hair in a pony tail, and French pedicure on her toenails.

The escalator reached the lower floor and I sped off to the next one going down another floor. This time I was one step below her so I turned back and she said hi. It's Sherry! Or "Sherry the Merry" as a good friend of mine Ar used to call her. And she looked the same as 14 years ago. She used to be a part-time model for magazine and TV ads back then.

Sherry, Ar and I used to work together at the bank. She was in the Personnel Department. She joined the bank earlier than I, right after getting her diploma. Ar joined a few months after I did. We used to be in a very small and close circle. Money was scarce then for Ar and I as we were only interns. Sherry was under probation, but for a permanent position. So she was better off. Ar and I shared one dinky room in PJ. We used to take the packed bus together to work, and wait for the bus home at Kota Raya. I remember getting a measly 6 bucks for my annual increment.

After Ar and I left the bank, I talked to her no more than five times and met her only once. Ar and I often talked and wondered about her whenever we met. The last time I met Ar at his house in October, he asked me if I had heard anything about "Sherry the Merry" being single again.

Today I got the answer to Ar's question. I did not ask her but the first thing she told me after saying hi was that her husband married the minah salleh, as if I had known the ensuing story. I did not ask further.

I also quickly learned from her that she left the bank recently and now she is running her own business out of Bangsar. She was so such in a hurry with her business accomplice that we didn't get to talk much. We did the routine exchange of phone numbers, patted each other, promised to have lunch or something one of these days. Then we parted ways.

Yu is picking me up for cigar dinner. Bought myself a Davidoff robusto. Gonna be a-munchin' and a-puffin' tonight.

i started working again yesterday. the office is still quiet. the boss is still on leave >:-> but the boss's boss is already in the office :-(

tomorrow i'm gonna start my vacation. i won't be connected (wired or wirelessly) to the internet or gsm network. in case i don't blog till after my vacation, i'd like to wish everybody Eid Mubarak, and forgive me for my wrong doings to you.

so we've wished selamat hari raya to one another in the office. almost everybody has gone home and only one or two souls left.

one of my projects was finally approved by the powers-that-be. shredding all the papers, cleaning up my desk to regain space for the ever-growing collection of books. it's getting quiet and tranquil up here among the clouds. will kinda miss this place during raya leave.

*yawn* another late night last night. met with a friend -- well, more like a comrade -- i didn't see for the past 3 years. he's posted overseas. coming back for good this january.

waiting for some calls for this evening's plan, since this will be the last night out in kl before raya.

We need love. Love acts as a filter. Love filters out imperfections, letting us see only the things we like to see. Take out love, and you'll take away the filter.

In the absence of love people say, "I hate you because of this ..." and "I hate you because of that ..."

i did a search for "dreamer's reality" on google and guess what ... google returned about 7,070 results.

ch finally got a good paying job. She's accepted a job here in kl, and believe me you ... It's right next door! She's starting december so she's moving down to kl any days now.

Oh me oh my ... Twenty years ago nz and i went to different hemispheres. I went north, she south. We were parted by oceans. We soon parted.

Yesterday, after twenty years we finally managed to talk about it. She was stuck on her pc working on her research paper so we were connected by e-mail. We talked about things that had happened 22 years ago. About "seluar kotak." About "stem satu sen" from her that i still keep.

This morning i got an e-mail from her. She said she's going to the library and gave me her phone number.

Oh me oh my ... It's been that long and i can still remember those moments *taking deep breath* ... Oh well.

wah got no time to blog yesterday.

right after office yesterday i went to tangs at star hill to get my linen pants. tangs was having an out of business sale so i got a 10% discount.

from there i took the monorail to berjaya times square again. to debenhams again. and got myself a shirt.

and no, this is not raya shopping. this is vacation shopping. yes i'm looking forward to my solo vacation. had been talking to geb ealier in the office. she's going to borneo christmas time. told her that medan or phuket would have been better for the same money. Y had wanted to come along too. no no no no ... this is my solo vacation. well, lemme see if there's better offer ... hehehe

got back to office just in time for iftar. at 8 pm S picked me up for dinner. she looked sad no more. great, so we wouldn't have to be sad tonight, at least during dinner. i had wanted to do japanese so she took me to the place she introduced me years ago. i had cha soba and miso soup again -- my fav when i'm really hungry. i had to request for the quail egg as it didn't come as standard at this place.

after dinner she dropped me home.

while around bkt bintang area, i saw a 1998 328i for sale for 158K. hmmm ... nice looking car. then i checked out at a few 4wds at lot 10 ... ssanyong, nissan x-trail, mazdas, and mitsus. the ones i liked were all about 150-160K. vans, 4wds, mpvs don't quite appeal to me. i'll stick to merz. i'll get it within one or two years, god willing.

Lunch time I took a cab to Berjaya Time Square to check out the indoor roller coaster rides. But they're not my cuppa tea.

Found the linen pants I was looking for at Island Shop inside Debenhams (RM126). Three colors: white, black, coconut husk. Nice! But they don't do alteration. Got to them at Tangs.

Took the monorail from Imbi to KL Sentral (RM1.60) instead of Bukit Nanas, thinking that I could switch to Putraline without much walking to do. I was wrong. It's a long walk to KL Sentral. Should have switched at Bukit Nanas.

KL Trekker note: there's a shuttle bus from KL Sentral to MidValley.

Saturday noon I stopped by Central Market to rent a John Grisham for my upcoming Raya vacation. After getting a book, the shopping frenzy of the festival got the best of me and I ended up buying myself a RM6-00 bead bangle made of coconut shell.

Then I made my way to Kota Raya shopping complex. As I walked towards Kota Raya from Central Market, a thought came to mind: That's the place which used to be the place to be. That thought, I realised as I was approaching the shopping complex, was not accurate. It is still the place to be, but for the new batch.

Who are these people who make up the new batch? They are the people who took my place. I used to be them. Fourteen years ago I used to go in and browse in the shopping complex while waiting for my Sri Jaya 238 bus to take me to my rented room in Petaling Jaya. I never spent any money there because the goods there were too expensive for me. I could only afford a RM2.00 chicken rice and RM0.10 iced water for lunch at the hawker center on the rooftop of Central Market. Or fried fish with rice and some accompaniment of ulam and sambal at the Hilton corner. Don't know where Hilton corner is? Then you haven't lived long enough in KL.

I have moved on since. Now I drive my car to my own house elsewhere, so I don't take the bus from Kota Raya anymore. The new batch will move on too one day. And they will be replaced by a fresh batch.

The cycle goes on. And Kota Raya lives.

"I feel good ... I know that I should ..." ~ James Brown

Slept at 5am last night and I still feel good. Amazing. Not been sleeping since Friday and my body is kind of adjusting well to it. Maybe it's the benefit of fasting. Well I don't know.

So what happened on those nights? Friday night Y and O picked me up for dinner. Got to sit at the back seat like a boss. Went to a Chinese seafood hawker. Hoped that the drive was longer as I needed the rest after tarawikh. Y parked her car by the road side and she got a ticket for it. Hah! Told her so.

Got home midnight, powered up the notebook, wrote a seven-page letter (which is not going to be read by anybody) till 2am. Stayed awake as my mind kept on reeling and flashing back some events. At 5.15am went out to check out the old place. What a disappointment.

And my fish was dying :'''( Had to do some emergency work on the aquarium.

Saturday midnight spent at As-Syakirin till just before sahur.

Sunday night, after a very long period of almost silence, S called. She sounded so bad. She picked me up at about 11. Had supper while listening to her sob story. Too much love lost, too much pain. Why is it that we always seem to need something only after we chose to discard it?

Throughout the conversation, my eyes just couldn't get off the tv set. England was leading France in the rugby World Cup. She sent me back just before sahur.

So, where's the sleep? Just short naps here and there. And I'm feeling good. Let's see how much longer I can keep this up.

And the days were filled too. Took a nostalgic walk (yup, walk) from Central Market to Kota Raya to Masjid Jamek. Will blog that later.

Oh yeah ... got my eyes on a Merc 230CE, a sexy coupe ... but not as sexy as my little red Alfa. Thanks Elle ;-)

It's Friday evening and what in the world am I still doing here! This weekend is going to be a marathon raya shopping ... aaarrgghh ... even the thoughts of it make me tired.

Ah hah! I've got to rent books for this raya break. Tie a string on my finger -- stop by Central Market. At least there's something fun for me to do.

Raya song is on the radio ... speaking of which ...

Six/seven weeks left this year and I have 29 vacation days, weekends included. This is how I'm going to spend them:

Twenty days with my family. Out of these, only nine days have been planned for. The other eleven still unplanned for, but certainly a few days will be used to shop for the school needs.

Meaning, nine days to spend with I, me, and myself. Who'll be accompanying me? Grisham, Ludlum, Clancy, Coelho, Dahl? Hmmm ... let's check out the bestsellers list shall we?

After reading this blog, someone wrote me an e-mail: "hmmmm... you and your world!!"

What was the impact of not having my mobile phone with me? Nothing much to me. Maybe some people took advantage of that by not updating me of their whereabouts ... for obvious reasons.

I got only one missed call from my good buddy who wanted to update me on the progress of his eye ops. Poor guy ... he lost the sight of his right eye. Doc said the blood clot from the ops makes the fluid in the eye murky. It might take weeks or months before the liquid clears up again.

So today I'm going wireless-less again. No handphone for another day.

Wireless world brings freedom. But I forgot to bring along my handphone to work today.

So, Freedom from the Wireless World!

If you didn't notice how I dressed to work yesterday, look at me today. I'm wearing the same shirt and pants >:->

Okay I got his one up too. Great place to be!